A rebuttal to the Raiders Minimization episode of the Big Bang Theory

Amy's thoughts on Raiders of the Lost Ark caused Sheldon's jaw to drop. Here
she is closing his mouth, but he's still none too happy about her ruining his favorite movie.

Last night, The Big Bang Theory aired an episode called "The Raiders Minimization." Sheldon Cooper and girlfriend Amy Farrah Fowler finished watching the movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark, which it turns out is one of Sheldon's favorites. Amy "ruined" it for Sheldon by saying that Indiana Jones is completely unnecessary to the plot. "With or without Indiana Jones, the Nazis would have still gotten the ark, they still would have opened it, and they still would have gotten their faces melted off. He contributed nothing to the overall story."

It's an interesting premise, but as a writer, I immediately did not like what she was saying. And for a room of supposedly high IQ's, they should have seen this fallacy in Amy's argument. Allow me to explain through example. If Amy had been in my home and said this, my rebuttal would have been thus: "Without Indiana Jones, no one would have known about the story. Therefore he is actually the most important person to the plot. He's the active narrator."

Indiana Jones and Marion in Raiders of the Lost Ark

There are many examples of this kind of storytelling. Moby Dick has a narrator called Ishmael who ends up being the only survivor after the white whale kills everyone. Raiders of the Lost Ark is the same kind of story. If you remove the narrator, Indiana Jones, then the whole story collapses because no one knows about it because no one survives to tell the tale. In other words, he's the point of view character through which we see everything. Even Marion couldn't have been a stand-in because had Indy not been around to save her, the Nazis would have killed her in Nepal and then taken the amulet for themselves.

So how do you like them apples, Amy Farrah Fowler? It looks like Raiders of the Lost Ark is not so minimal after all (and in my opinion) remains one of the great triumphs of fiction. I do have to admit though, that until Amy brought it up in last night's episode, I never realized that Indiana Jones is completely unnecessary to the ultimate outcome (and that is probably much closer to what she meant).

An infographic of space travel from year 0 to the end of time for Valentines Day

From one Whovian to another, love is timeless. In my best River Song imitation..."Hello Sweetie."

Rose went away

So the doctor is blue.

Ask Donna, "Where's the Doctor?"

She'll reply, "Doctor Who?"

Sarah Jane, and Martha,

And now both the Ponds

Had their fun with the Doctor

And now they've all gone.

So ask me again

Why the TARDIS is blue:

There's a sad man inside

With both hearts torn in two.

                                                          -- by A. Whovian

Wishing you a time-tastic Valentine's Day in the language of four of Dr. Who's greatest villains :)

THE SILENCE: "Forget me not."

THE DALEKS: "INFATUATE!!"

THE CYBERMEN:  "I wouldn't change a thing about you."

THE WEEPING ANGELS: "I can't take my eyes off you."

And if that isn't the coolest, nerdiest Valentine's greeting you have EVAR gotten, then I leave you with an infographic of space travel from year 0 to the end of time for Valentine's Day. Notice that "The Doctor" occupies both ends. In the immortal words of Sheldon Cooper, "If you don't have a Tardis, you stink and your party stinks."

If you take away anything from my post today, it should be this: all it takes to turn someone into a Dalek is to subtract love and add anger. May even the grumpiest bulldog appreciate that statement.

Have a great Thursday :)

Dungeons & Dragons Sheldon Cooper Style - Bazinga!

Today my friends, I give you sixteen precious lessons lifted from the brain of Dr. Sheldon Cooper applicable to fantasy writing and the lives of nerds everywhere.

1. Any plan that causes the DM to ask, "Are you sure you want to do that?" should be rethought immediately.
2. Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
3. You can't succeed at anything unless you roll the dice.
4. Never ever throw a fireball in a closed room.
5. Never be the first person to touch an unknown substance.
6. Hitting on the King's daughter is never a good idea.
7. If you spend enough time in sleazy bars talking to shady characters, adventure will find you.
8. Always have an exit strategy.
9. Siege artillery doesn't discriminate.
10. Never use a weapon that's braver than you are.
11. If the DM is smiling, it's already too late.
12. Never ever give the Dungeon Master ideas.
13. If something looks too good to be true, check for traps at once.
14. Never summon anything that you don't know how to dismiss.
15. Treat your hirelings well; they're the ones carrying all of your loot.
16. If all else fails, bribe the DM with pizza.

And a bonus from my friend James:

Never ever be without a Wall of Iron. You can drop it on someone and they go splat.

There you have it and Happy Wednesday.

*DISCLAIMER: If you don't get the above stuff then you are not nearly nerdy enough and should go and buy a Player's Handbook and Dungeon Master's Guide and hang out with some young men in a game store. You'll find that they're very imaginative as they dream of a day when they can have a +5 Holy Avenger!

The Wheaton Paradigm As Applied To Twitter--Sheldon Would Be So Proud

BAZINGAAAAA!!!

I hope you watched the premiere of George R.R. Martin's "Game of Thrones" last night on HBO. It was really good but if you missed it, you can probably catch it again sometime soon. That being said, comment if you really liked the series :).

Hee hee Happy Monday my friends. This is gonna be an amazing week :) Spring is finally here, flowers are growing, and warm air and sunshine have decided to appear.