Monday, August 11, 2014

This Rob Lowe trailer treats Shark Week like a boss

This Rob Lowe trailer for Shark Week is over the top fun as he's #likeaboss riding a pair of sharks like skis. As a caveat, I'm terrified of sharks. I got scarred by seeing Jaws when I was way too young to be watching sharks chomp people in half. Now, I understand that they perform a necessary duty for the ecosystem, but I don't think there's ever going to be a time when I choose to go swimming in their food bowl, a.k.a. the ocean. These predators are so finely honed to smelling blood that they can detect a single drop in an area the size of an olympic swimming pool. And apparently, they like to eat things with a high concentration of body fat (which is another reason for me to stay out of their food bowl).

I plan on watching "Shark of Darkness: Wrath of Sumbarine" which I hope is not given the megalodon docudrama treatment from 2013. If you don't watch "Shark Week" (sharks aren't for everyone?), last year Discovery aired a fake documentary about megalodon supposedly still being alive (and not extinct). Well this year, they are highlighting a famous shark dubbed "Submarine" by the locals. Submarine is the name of a 70-year-old legendary shark that haunts the South African waters, has been sighted numbers of times, and eye-witnesses claim its a 35-foot-long great white. Oh's eaten a lot of people. Just to give you a little perspective, Jaws was only 25-feet-long in comparison. So this thing, if it's real, would be the size of a huge bus.

Here's the schedule for the rest of the week:

9 PM Jaws Strikes Back
10 PM Monster Hammerhead

9 PM Alien Sharks: Return to the Abyss
10 PM Lair of the Mega Shark

9 PM Zombie Sharks
10 PM Spawn of Jaws: The Birth

9 PM I Escaped Jaws 2
10 PM Sharkageddon

9 PM Megalodon: The Extended Cut
10 PM Megalodon: New Evidence

9 PM Great White Matrix
10 PM Megalodon: New Evidence


  1. Alien sharks! I'll have to watch that one.
    A friend who teaches scuba diving said that if people here knew how many sharks were just off the beach line, they'd never go in the water. Needless to say, I don't go in the ocean.

  2. I have to check some of these out. When my children were younger, we would always tune into Shark Week. Jaws was terrifying the first time I saw it.

  3. I'm surprised they can still find stuff to talk about after like 20 years of this. I'm with you about not going in the ocean. Besides sharks there's all those whales and giant octopi and weird creatures they haven't even classified yet.

  4. Hahaha… laughing at your "food bowl" comment. :) I'm terrified of sharks from reading Deception Point from Dan Brown… yeah… that scarred me, and I think I was an adult when I read it ;-)

  5. I watched that Shark Week promo several times before realizing it was Rob Lowe riding those sharks. I won't be hanging around for Shark Week.

  6. You made me laugh! I also saw Jaws way too young, so I often think of Sharks when I go in the water. But I do go in... unless it's too cold. I'm pretty wimpy when it comes to temperature. And jellyfish. They're all over the place in August.

  7. I have a feeling the Submarine show is another fake-out, but i'm way too lazy to do any digging into it to find out for sure

  8. the execs from SyFy are probably sharpening their pencils ready to take notes. Ghost Shark anybody?


  9. I've never seen Jaws, but my sister watched it a couple of years ago (she's twelve now) and she refuses to get on boats.

  10. The few times I've swam in the ocean were awesome. I didn't consider Jaws at the time. It seems there were a lot of shark movies on last week..maybe they should call it shark month.

  11. What I heard is that some of the submarine thing is faux but some of it is based on an actual shark in the area. It's kind of half and half. Yeah, I saw a bit of it, and...ick...

  12. The only question I missed on my Scuba exam was about sharks. The correct answer was supposed to be that they weren't dangerous (this referred to all species of sharks). My own answer was pretty much Oh Hell YES They're Dangerous!

    Jaws scared the crapola out of me too. But when I was little I didn't know about sharks so what scared me were killer octopuses.

  13. I try to stay away from Shark Week.