Let's all agree to rebrand shark movies from "Horror" to "Shark Fiction."

You know how genre's in fiction kind of just appear? Maybe it's the book industry that declares a new genre (kind of like the Academy Awards suddenly makes up a new category) and everyone just has to deal? For example, the broad category of fantasy has been divided (since the eighties) into "young adult" and "dark fantasy" and "urban fantasy" and "supernatural" and what all else I'm forgetting. I think the same thing needs to happen with shark stories. So here's my proposal:

When Jaws came out last century in the late 1970's, it was branded a horror movie. But over time, I think the argument can be made (and I'm going to make it) that it was, in fact, the first movie in a new genre. We currently have a genre called, "Dark Fiction." So along these lines I'm wanting to create one called, "Shark Fiction." Catchy, right?! No need to compliment me on my acumen and creative abilities...YOU'RE SO WELCOME. And now I'm going to list all of the movies and media I can think of that are "Shark Fiction" starting with the latest one which opens tomorrow called "The Meg." I have no doubt that you will be convinced that (after seeing this list) there are enough individual properties to warrant its own category in today's "category obsessed" world.

1) The Meg
2) Jaws
3) Sharknado (and all sequels)
4) 47 Meters Down
5) The Shallows
6) Shark Tale
7) Deep Blue Sea
8) Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus
9) The Reef
10) Bait
11) Open Water
12) Shark Night
13) Ghost Shark
14) 2-Headed Shark Attack
15) 3-Headed Shark Attack
16) Dark Tide
17) Jurassic Shark
18) Sand Sharks
19) Sharktopus
20) Jaws 2
21) Jaws 3-D
22) Jaws: The Revenge
23) Red Water
24) Megashark versus Crocosaurus
25) Avalanche Sharks
26) Malibu Shark Attack
27) Swamp Shark
28) Dinoshark
29) Cruel Jaws
30) Shark Attack
31) Hammerhead: Shark Frenzy
32) Snow Shark
33) Super Shark
34) Shark in Venice
35) Spring Break Shark Attack
36) 12 Days of Terror
37) Shark Swarm
38) Raging Sharks
39) Shark Zone
40) Monster Shark
41) Blue Demon
42) Great White
43) Tintoera
44) Mako: The Jaws of Death

As you can see, there are at least 44 titles I could think of (and probably many more). This is its own category folks. I don't think "horror" cuts the mustard anymore.

Long live "Shark Fiction!"

Deep Blue Sea has a sequel that's only nineteen years late. Hey better late than never.

In 1999, a movie called Deep Blue Sea came out. To anyone that knows me, I've got a complicated relationship with shark movies. It kind of all started with Jaws, because my mother took me to a movie that was popular in the U.S.A., and being from Japan, she didn't understand that it was inappropriate for a six-year-old. For the record, it scared her too. However, it gave me nightmares for years. I still remember the fountain of blood erupting from Quint's mouth when he slid down the deck to the destroyed stern where the shark started to chomp him up. That was pure (early) Steven Spielberg horror right there, and it got me very interested in the creatures (to the point of kind of a macabre fascination with them).

For a while in my college years, I contemplated being a marine biologist just to study sharks. That never panned out. But I do go out of my way to see most shark movies at least once. To date, none have been as entertaining as Jaws, but Deep Blue Sea was close. It's subject matter, i.e., increasing the intelligence of sharks to create a cure for Alzheimer's disease, was brilliant. L.L. Cool J as the cook was awesome too, especially when he could shift from terror to say...lecturing on the proper way to make an omelet. And then there was (of course) the scene where Samuel L. Jackson got eaten that came out of the blue right after a powerful and heroic monologue. That was one of the first movies that really destroyed the idea that "you can't kill the hero" by stomping on it with all fins on deck (pun intended). I only later pieced together that Samuel L. Jackson actually does die in a lot of his films, so that's a kind of an expectation now. Maybe in the future I'll do a blog post that highlights Samuel L. Jackson's top 10 deaths from Jurassic Park to Deep Blue Sea to Revenge of the Sith. The man (seriously) knows how to do an onscreen death.

So Deep Blue Sea is getting a sequel, and it doesn't have any people from the original cast. But it does feature angry "supra-genius" sharks (maybe stealing a clicky thing from Jurassic World) who appear to be hungry for man-flesh (borrowing a term from The Lord of the Rings). I've embedded the trailer below for your enjoyment, so you too can watch and see how SyFy plans to spend its hard-earned money.

Assorted musings I have regarding this sequel:

1) Was it always a Deep Blue Sequel or did it just get re-branded post-production? It makes me wonder, you know. I mean, the trailer seems to feature the same underwater base and roughly the same story. So...is this just a situation where they filmed a movie about intellisharks and then were like...oh yeah...there's another movie just like this one! Let's just make this a sequel!

2) It's January 2018 and I know we all swore that we'd never see another bad movie, but we will. And this is direct to video...so you know its potential to be really bad is far worse than something that gets a major release. I know there's people out there reading my words, salivating at the line, "direct to video." You must join me in this pilgrimage.